Am I smarter than a 4th grader?

My 9 year old daughter, Mia, had a Science quiz yesterday. As we were reviewing the information that she needed to regurgitate, I came across the most interesting sentence for 4th grade curriculum.

The notes were based on “working in a Science Team.” There were suggestions about listening and completing your tasks well. There were different team roles spelled out, like “Task Manager” and “Skill Builder.” I was impressed with all of these.

It wasn’t until I reached a section entitled, “Special Team Skills” that I stopped short. Third, on a list of three, the following skill was spelled out:

Criticize ideas, not people.

I paused momentarily and my daughter asked why I stopped reading. I looked up at her and smiled.

“Mommy is learning from your Science notes,” was what I said. This truth pleased my daughter.

Talk about a special skill, huh?! How often have I criticized a politician or friend or family member instead of questioning their ideas?

Admittedly, “Are you crazy?” is a common question I ask my husband.

Second on Mia’s list was:

Entertain lots of ideas before coming to a conclusion.

Sheesh. What ever happened to graduated cylinders and dissecting frogs?

Just like in Science, I think it is more than important to have a discerning mind and sharp intellect. Some ideas are just bad ones – in our government, in our culture, in our homes - and should be challenged. But as Christians, do we challenge ideas or do we contribute to the hostility and defensiveness of the world by criticizing people?

Once again, we return to the idea of defending the space to love someone over defending our “morality.” Honest dialogue is critical to the healing of the world, but if no one feels safe enough to talk, no one feels safe enough to change.